Nothing in this world lasts forever, and yet, these celebrities can’t seem to figure that out.
In the real world, most people know when to officially give up or “let it go” already (watch me break out into a medley of Frozen songs). If it comes to a job we absolutely hate or a toxic relationship in our life, we know when to quit it. Nothing in this world lasts forever, and yet, these celebrities can’t seem to figure that out. Their final curtain call of fame happened forever ago, but they still think they’re somehow relevant to fans – fans who no longer give two craps about you or even remembers why they liked you in the first place. It’s time for these 15 celebs to take a hint, take a bow, and just disappear into the washed-up oblivion haze that stars go when their 15 minutes of fame is up.
15. Jaime King
Ah, poor Jaime King. As she rides on the coattails of her supposed bestie Taylor Swift, she hasn’t realized that Swift is slowly snipping away at the tails with a massive pair of scissors. King used to be the “It” go-to model of the late 90’s, but now she seems desperate to keep herself surrounded by people more famous than she ever was (yes, including Swift). I mean, what did she really ever do in the first place? Sure, she had tiny parts in some films where we usually saw her and just confused her with another actress altogether. Today, she sticks close to Swift’s shooting star while her own star imploded before it was even really born. Sure, that makes for a pretty aftermath, but eventually it turns into a black hole of suck.
14. Tila Tequila
Is there anything this woman WON’T do to desperately cling to her 15 minutes? A long time ago, Tila Tequila was some internet sensation (or was it MTV sensation? I can never really remember) because she hitched her wagon to MySpace (REMEMBER MYSPACE??? Man, I’m old) before coming out as bi and obtaining her very own reality show. But, to be honest, who doesn’t have their own reality show these days? She then became engaged to heiress Casey Johnson for a short period of time and seemed to cash in on Johnson’s tragic, yet boozy, death. Some blogs even claimed that Tila had encouraged Johnson’s binge-ing, partying, ways. After the heiress’ death, Tila’s little Neo-Nazi ways caught up to her and she went on to praise Hitler while posing in a Nazi uniform because she’s clearly and utterly unhinged. It’s time to drop the act, sweetie, and realize you’re severely washed up.
13. Christina Milian
Remember when singer Christina Milian was tearing up the charts back in 2004? Sure, we all do, but what has she done lately? Okay, so she sometimes lends her ear to up-and-coming singers on NBC’s The Voice, she hasn’t produced another hit song or album of her own in years. I find this to be a shame since Milian is not only talented, but also drop-dead gorgeous. It seems like she’s just sitting on her talent for the time being, hopefully waiting for the right moment to stage a come-back. But has she overstayed her welcome in that sense? If she has an ace up her sleeve, she better show it quickly because Hollywood and the music industry are two very unforgiving places who will cast you aside after you’ve reached a certain age. Sure, women are trying to fight this and will eventually win this battle, but it probably won’t happen today or tomorrow. So Milian had better act fast if she doesn’t want to see her candle officially burn out.
Okay, this dude just needs to go the hell away. Before he started dating the very underage Kylie Jenner, Tyga was pretty much a nobody rapper. He hitched his wagon onto the Kardashian clan in hopes of driving up his album sales, but it only made him more susceptible to harsh criticism at the fact that he was, hello, doing all the nasty stuff with a 16-year old girl. Of course, they never confirmed their relationship to the public until Kylie officially became an adult on her 18th birthday (in which Tyga bought her a Lamborghini… probably with Kylie’s own money), but fans aren’t stupid. Tyga even has a kid with Blac Chyna, who carried Rob Kardashian’s kid. Jeez, will this trash circle ever break? Give it up Tyga, no on is going to remember your name in a couple months. Pretty sure Kylie’s even forgotten your name.
11. Kristin Callavari
Maybe if you’re desperate to hold onto your fading fame, DON’T marry one of the worst quarterbacks in the history of Chicago? This is what former reality TV star Kristin Cavallari seemed to do when she up and married Jay Cutler a while back. Pretty sure she only married him because she went and got herself pregnant by accident (who would willingly have Cutler’s baby anyway? Someone intercepted a Plan B, I see). Cavallari was at the height of her fame way back in the early 2000’s when she starred on Laguna Beach with frenemy Lauren Conrad, who went on to have an extremely successful career. Sure Cavallari did some music videos, but when she started on that whole anti-vaccine rant and raves, she got super old super fast. Time to just retire from the business and focus on being a housewife to a washed up, out of work, quarterback.
10. Ashlee Simpson
Ashlee Simpson seems to have been the punch line to the world’s lamest, poorly worded, joke. We first noticed her when she was doing cartwheels in big sister Jessica’s dimly-lit shadow, but we quickly became annoyed with her ever-present face. She attempted to start her own music career, but that fizzled out after that whole lip-syncing incident on Saturday Night Live. When she eventually grew her balls back and made another attempt at the live singing again, she got seriously booed. Nevertheless, she persisted. She ended up getting a nose job and marrying some guy named Evan Ross. She even tried to sell their wedding photos to magazines, who politely declined because they didn’t feature any shots of Jessica. Give it up, Little Simpson – no one cared about you then, and no one really knows you’re alive now.
9. Paris Hilton
I remember whenever I saw an image of Paris Hilton or heard a clip of her talking, my own IQ would drop a few points. Sure, she and BFF of the moment Nicole Richie were charmingly stupid as dirt on the reality show The Simple Life, but she couldn’t have thought that would hold her over for the rest of her life. What’s even more hilarious is that Kardashian royalty Kim Kardashian used to be her personal assistant… or her closet organizer… or something along those lines. Now that Kim has severely bypassed Paris thanks to Keeping Up with the Kardashians, what’s a blonde heiress to do? Apparently, Hilton is DJ’ing now and attempting to make her music career work. And I’m not calling it a “musical comeback” either because I don’t recall any music of hers taking off in the first place.
8. Hilary Duff
Ah, Hilary Duff – your Disney days are long gone, my friend, and you’re just now tugging at loose straws. These days, Duff is starring in the show Younger, a show that’s developed quite a cult following, but she apparently wants more. Duff signed a management contract with Scooter Braun last year in order to kick start her music career yet again. When she attempted a comeback a while back with her single “Chasing the Sun”, she fell flat on her face when the song peaked at No.79 on the charts. The album Breathe In, Breathe out did okay, but it never really caught on, so Duff resorted to calling the paparazzi on herself when she was out doing day to day activities. Now THAT’S sad. Maybe she should just give up the music thing and stick with Younger.
7. Lindsay Lohan
While some of the people on this list had little to no talent to their name, actress Lindsay Lohan did and had a promising career ahead of her. That is until drugs and alcohol found their way into her system on multiple occasions. Along with the booze and drugs, the police actually found her on a more than a few occasions too! Lohan was arrested a bunch of times and even when she tried to attempt a comeback, she ended up shooting herself in the foot. Even Oprah Winfrey tried to help the troubled actress and created the Lindsay miniseries, but all Lohan did was drive Winfrey insane with her backtalk. She found herself engaged to a crap load of men, one of whom was a Russian billionaire. But like most of her movies, the engagements flopped. It’s a shame that a young woman with so much promise screwed up her life in such a strange and torrid way.
6. Rebecca Black
Why, oh WHY is this person still a thing? Years ago, when Rebecca Black hit the scene with that atrocious viral song “Friday”, she was cyberbullied into a corner. While I, on any level, agree with criticizing a young girl’s looks, I do have an issue with her thinking her song was actually good and didn’t make your ears bleed bloody murder. Back in 2011, Black became “famous” by accident after comedian Daniel Tosh featured her YouTube video on his Comedy Central show. The young singer is now back and has a new track out called “The Great Divide” which is actually climbing the charts. Perhaps she’s able to get out of the shadow of her former flop? Or will she just become a laughing stock best left behind? Time will soon tell if this can be considered a “comeback” or not.
5. Kevin Jonas
So even though the Jonas bros all went their own way, all of them seem to be doing pretty well with their solo careers. Well, at least Nick Jonas and Joe Jonas are. Kevin? Not so much. Apparently, Kevin up and got married and decided he’d rather cash in on THAT. Yes, he tried to cash in on his own marriage by doing a reality show with his wife Danielle called Married to Jonas. It only lasted one year because, well, no one really gave a damn about THAT Jonas brother. Especially since he got married. Even though the show is long gone, Kevin tries to cash in on anything and everything, including his own wife’s pregnancies. They tend to take social media VERY seriously since it’s really the only thing going for them at this point. Time to move it on out to the glue factory, folks. Your time is clearly up.
4. Camilla Belle
Here is another talent gone to waste, but not by her own hand. Camilla Belle had the looks and the brains to go far in the Hollywood world, but she was crucified by Taylor Swift herself. Apparently, Belle was the subject of the Swift song “Better Than Revenge”, which was written after Belle started dating Taylor’s ex, Joe Jonas. She also starred in some “not so stellar” movies, but thankfully those specific movies didn’t tank because the actress was starring in them (she was just a victim of some crappy writing). She’s still a front row spectacle at numerous fashion shows and the cameras haven’t stopped clicking around her, but her light appears to be fading rather rapidly. Let’s all blame Taylor Swift for this monstrosity of a waste. Sigh.
3. Ray J
So, apparently a tape can only get you so far in life. While it seemed to work out better for Ray J’s homemade tape partner in crime, Kim Kardashian, who now has an entire empire thanks to that tape, life doesn’t seem to be doing the same for poor Ray. Brandy’s little brother appears to be down on his luck these days, and it probably doesn’t help that ex Kim is richer than hell and married to Kanye West and is building a beautiful family while Ray J is probably eating cold Chinese take-out and staying in most nights. He tried to make a dating show on VH1 fly, but it crashed and burned, along with some diss track that flopped. Maybe he can revive his career by talking Kim into doing another tape? No? Probably not? Never hurts to ask.
2. Ashley Greene
If you even bothered to read through the Twilight series on your own time, you’d know that starring in the films would likely be career suicide. Someone should have probably warned actress Ashley Greene of that pitfall. Greene played the spiky-haired Alice Cullen in the Twilight movies and her acting was just as stale as the scripts themselves. Audiences didn’t forget it either and every single film or TV show she’s done since has seemed to tank. Remember The Apparition? Or CBGB? Yeah, neither do I. I do remember the show Pan Am that I assumed had promise, but just like everything else she would touch, the project turned into a lame duck and was canceled after a single season. She doesn’t appear to be in much lately, preferring to lay low for a while, which is probably best for the actress. She did become engaged to Paul Khoury this last year, so good for her on that level.
1. Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag
How have these two not melted in the sun yet? Married whiners Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag have attempted to stage so very many comebacks that it’s hard to keep track. After hitting the middle by starring in the show The Hills, they blew all their money on body changes, the couple went on to star in a handful of other reality TV shows: Celebrity Big Brother, Celebrity Wife Swap, Marriage Boot Camp: Reality Stars, and finally, I’m A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here! I’m thinking they’re using the word “celebrity” a little too loosely here. The couple reeks of desperation and won’t seem to go away. While they keep trying, Hollywood keeps rejecting them – with good reason. Maybe it’s time to retire to a cubical somewhere and learning how to type?